 | Comedy, Relationship Builder101 Ways to Show Your Love to Your GeekPosted Tuesday, March 4th, 2008 and visited 1190 times, 4 so far today by MInTheGap |
Thank you for visiting Weekend Kindness-- the blog that helps you build positive relationships! If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed so that you don't miss a single post from one of our great authors!
There’s a special breed of man out there, a man that is unlike any other. He won’t be swayed by watching hours of sports, or wooed with the latest hot rod. He likes to spend most of his time away from the beach, under the glow of an artificial sun.
You love him, but you can’t understand why he’s drawn to the clicking of keys, the fluid motion of the mouse or the whirr of the DVD-ROM drive. And so, I’ve prepared a list of 101 ways that you can show love to the geek in your life:
1. Don’t sneak up behind him when he’s in the middle of a game.
Tactical operations to defeat the enemy and claim the outpost take a lot of concentration. No, he can’t be bothered with the fact that the youngest child has fallen down the stairs, that someone just flushed his favorite baseball card or that the house is on fire. He’s got those headphones on for a reason, and he’s really Ignatius Bizarro right now, not your husband. If he doesn’t release the drone at just the right time, civilization as we know it could end.
2. Understand his need for new equipment.
It’s a conspiracy. You have a computer that works fine. It does your e-mail, it surfs the next, and it lets you do IM. But that’s not enough for your geek. Powerful forces are aligned to make sure that when he wants to play his favorite game he has to get new equipment. And this equipment always costs money. He will not have a good reason to justify the expense (he’ll use some lame excuse about being able to develop applications or websites faster, but we all know it’s for the games).
3. Install full spectrum bulbs so he gets some Sun.
He’s much more at home behind his computer, and if he stays behind it too long the sun may become fatal to his bleached white skin. Make sure that wherever your computer is you install light bulbs that will protect his skin. He’ll thank you for it the next time you manage to pry him away from his desk and take him to the beach (under the pretenses that he has to try out the new Blackberry (see #2) that you got him with high speed wireless Internet).
4. Don’t get on the computer when he gets up to go to the bathroom.
We know that you secretly have been watching the computer all day, waiting for the opportunity to get online and check your e-mail because your mothertold you that your sister Martha’s second cousin twice removed sent you pictures of her dog’s new set of twins. And even though he may be spending his time creating scent combinations that you didn’t know were possible, and it may take a full 10 minutes… You’d better make sure to cover your tracks! Make sure you open a new window in the web browser, don’t take over his session (and you better hope the browser doesn’t crash!). He had just the right tabs on his browser and if he catches the hint of your perfume, there will be trouble in River City.
5. Don’t eat over the keyboard or have an open container near the computer.
We all know the stories too well. “I just was having a snack and I reached for the mouse…” Famous last words. There’s nothing that going to bring a tear to his eye as much as hearing that soda was spilled into his keyboard or computer… unless that means that he’ll be able to get new equipment (see #2). Yes, if you had the audacity to eat near his box, you’d better be ready to cough up the extra money to get him the machine that he’s had his eye on or you’re likely to have a sulking blob of mush on your hands. To him, the computer is like family… Yes, that’s why he leaves the little yellow light on the monitor on all night.
So, there you have it: 101 ways to… wait, you didn’t get it? And you have a geek guy? Well, go ahead and ask him what makes this post so funny. He’ll get it.
Visit This Author's Website
Tags
Tags for this article: 101 , binary , computers , equipment , geek , love , romance
[?]
Type in a relevant tag, and click the button, and help organize this blog's information.
[More Help]
Related Posts
Tags for this article: 101 , binary , computers , equipment , geek , love , romance
[?][More Help]
March 4th, 2008 at 3:01 pm Subscribed to Comments
ROTFL!!!
And what if I married a dork?? How do I show love to him?
(And why does this article remind me of my brother?)
Look at his shirt.
http://i84.photobucket.com/alb...../Jon-1.jpg
March 4th, 2008 at 3:15 pm Subscribed to Comments
Only a TRUE geek counts tips in binary. Even I had to be reminded. It’s amazing how much I have changed since leaving my coding roots for the greener pastures of management.
March 4th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Geez now I have to learn BINARY too??! Just to read MIN?Meg
Mrs.MegLogan’s last blog post..How I Potty Trained My 20 Month Old Daughter
March 4th, 2008 at 5:14 pm Subscribed to Comments
Meg, I can find a binary translator for you, if you’d like. It’s a staple in my life when I talk to Min. (Just kidding!
)
AG’s last blog post..The Jealous Lover
March 4th, 2008 at 5:29 pm
I’m not married to a geek, but almost any woman can makeover #4 to “Don’t change the channel when he goes to the bathroom or gets a snack or answers the phone or … . In short, don’t change the channel just because he gets up from the couch.”
Claudia’s last blog post..Loving Relationships Can Improve Your Health
March 4th, 2008 at 5:36 pm Subscribed to Comments
Or, if you’re in an ornery mood (I never am, so I’d never do this.) you can change the channel when he gets up and hide the remote before he gets back. Then look innocent when he comes back.
Like I said, I’d never do anything like that.
AG’s last blog post..The Jealous Lover
March 5th, 2008 at 7:22 am
OMG, this is so true! It sounds like you were writing about my SR!!
March 5th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Larry, Meg: I actually have a binary watch. Fortunately it has the numbers on it so that I can do the math to figure out what time it is. It was a Christmas gift.
Claudia, AG: Nothing is worse than coming back and finding that you were watching an action show and now she’s watching a C-Section. Man those things gross me out.
March 5th, 2008 at 1:37 pm Subscribed to Comments
Why would I watch a C-Section? Silly Min. Give me a drama or comedy any day.
AG’s last blog post..Stellar Kart
March 5th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
I’m not sure why anyone likes to watch them, but it fascinates my wife. I always have to look the other way.
March 5th, 2008 at 2:27 pm Subscribed to Comments
Weakling.
AG’s last blog post..PartyLite is Booming!
March 5th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
And just how many of those have you watched, AG?
March 5th, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Hilarious! I’m not married to a techno geek, but appreciate the insight regardless!
Wow, what VirtuousBlonde puts up with!!! (Just kidding!)
Mary’s last blog post..Junk for Cash
March 5th, 2008 at 4:45 pm Subscribed to Comments
Mary, you’re not the only one to have thought that.
Min, I was working toward a pre-med degree for most of high school and a semester of college. (God had other plans.) I’ve seen my share of medical procedures. My favorite class was forensics… there were some crazy cadavers we got to see.
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 6th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
Hey! I resemble that remark.
My wife also looked at some cadavers. So I guess that may be where she gets her strong stomach from. Still, if someone’s hurt or having a hard time breathing I’m the more calm, cool, and less stressed one.
March 6th, 2008 at 4:47 pm Subscribed to Comments
Well, of course you’re more calm and less stressed… the other person’s having a hard time breathing. They’d be crazy to be calm and unstressed.
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 10th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
Nah, I’m talking about when my son had croup and stopped breathing. For some reason I was calm, even though he was having a very tough time breathing.
March 11th, 2008 at 3:45 pm Subscribed to Comments
That’s pretty cool, actually. You can be more helpful when calm and rational instead of panicked.
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 12th, 2008 at 8:12 am
It also means that I’m usually cool under stressful situations, though I did go through a period where I was actually stressed. And just like most people, if I’m overtired all bets are off.
March 12th, 2008 at 10:55 am Subscribed to Comments
It’s amazing to me what a lack of sleep can to do one’s body. That’s something I’m definatly going to question God about - what is the mechanism that makes sleep do everything it does?
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 12th, 2008 at 5:23 pm
Hey, maybe I can blame my panic at 7 yo’s getting her teeth kicked out on my exhaustion and illness! That makes me feel better. I am usually unruffle-able (is that a word? lol).
In any case, I was VERY thankful for my Mr. Steady. Dh is just like you in a crisis. Very rational.
Mary’s last blog post..More Daylight, Less Sleep
March 17th, 2008 at 10:21 am
They say that the number one cause of Christians falling is that their tired! It’s amazing how much less sanctified we appear when we’re fatigued.
In any case, I tend to think along the lines of “Well now this happened, what do I do now” rather than getting caught up in the moment– most times.
March 17th, 2008 at 11:52 am Subscribed to Comments
Very true. I got only two hours of sleep last night and I so should not be doing data entry right now!
Burnout is a toughie, too. Lots of ministries and volunteers fail due to burnout.
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 17th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
Well, you give to the people that get things done more to do– and they rarely say no– and then you wonder why everything falls crashing to the floor!
March 17th, 2008 at 1:33 pm Subscribed to Comments
It’s true. Are you familiar with the 80/20 rule in churches (and I imagine elsewhere)? 80% of the work is done by 20% of the people. Sad but true.
AG’s last blog post..Mary
March 18th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
It’s true, until you come to a truly small church. Then you know who’s really into it and who isn’t.