Weekend Kindness
Reaching Others Through Kindness

When my husband and I were first married, I had the most awful time taming my tongue. I would whine & nag, cause an argument, promise that this would not happen again, only to do it all over again the next day. I would pray for the patience and strength to stop this nasty behavior and really did try my hardest, yet nothing was working. During this time, my husband wound up being sent to the middle east for several months. He did not have internet access where he was located, nor could he call home often. As if these were not challenging enough, anybody who has ever been on an international phone call knows how “fun” they can be. ;o)

While my husband was away, several bizarre events took place that were far more stressful than the minor things that upset me before. I sat around one day and allowed some nasty feelings to brew and was quite upset by the time my husband’s next phone call came. As I spoke to him on the phone, I placed myself in his shoes for a moment and realized that not only were my problems not any of his doing, my situation was nothing compared to what he was going through. In fact, I realized that this situation was not worth venting over and was certainly not worth arguing over, especially on a costly phone call that was limited to a mere ten minutes. For the first time in a long time, I was able to tame my venomous little tongue and kept at it for the remainder of his mission.

From this phone call on, I came to a new understanding about arguments that has been a great blessing. Arguing is not just “unworthy” when my husband is overseas, but arguing is really not worth doing *any* of the time. If we battle it out, we will not only not solve the issue at hand, but will likely cause strife and hurt between each other. Rather than act foolish and hateful, I must make a point to put things into perspective, pray, and come to my husband with a gentle & loving servant’s heart. I must remember that the battle is not worth it.

I encourage everyone to look at conflicts with others in this light. The next time you find yourself ready to “battle”, ask yourself if the issue at hand is worth the potential hurt, strife, and ill feelings between you and your “opponent”? Chances are it is not and recognizing this fact can allow you to have a loving, calm conversation about the issue or conflict that will solve the problem, rather than an angry mess that goes nowhere.

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