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Relationship Builder

A Little Less ‘No’

Posted Tuesday, September 4th, 2007 and visited 1018 times, 1 so far today
by revka

Here’s a simple idea for building relationships: say ‘yes’ as much as is realistically possible.

Sometimes I automatically say no to requests without even considering whether I might instead be able to say yes. I hadn’t realized just how much I do this until my friend Frank posted on this topic at his blog, The New Parent.? I started listening to myself and realized that I say ‘no’ or ‘not right now’ way too often.

“Read us a story, Mommy?”? “Can we go play outside?”? “Can I help you make that?” “Why don’t you come sit with me, Honey?”

Those are some of the questions that earned my negative response this past week.? Upon reflection, I have come to realize that my negative responses are often driven by selfish reasons:

  • Sometimes I am fully immersed in the task at hand and do not want to stop.
  • Sometimes I am too worried about the inevitable mess that will result from my girls’ “help.”
  • Sometimes I honestly feel like I have too much to do to assent to the request.

Those reasons may be valid, but they revolve around me.? I am determined to say ‘yes’ more often.? “Yes, I will read to you.”? “Yes, I think that going outside is a great idea.”? “Yes, you may help me make supper.”? “Yes, Honey, I would love to sit with you.”

Take note of your responses to requests this week.? Do you say ‘no’ more than you should?? Together, let’s work on being a little less selfish in our responses and make the time to say ‘yes’ to our loved ones’ requests instead.



A happily married mother to three girls, Revka enjoys the exchange of ideas found through the medium of blogging. Her blogs include The Porch Light, Rants, Raves, and Rejects, and RS Designs.
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2 Responses to “A Little Less ‘No’”

  1. MInTheGap Says: